Daily Archives: April 15, 2010

Things Women Obsess Over That Guys Could Really Give Two Sh*ts About

A couple conversations i’ve recently had with a few female friends, this discussion further drove home the idea that many women make their dating and relationship life much harder than it has to be by driving themselves crazy over things that won’t affect a man’s opinion of and level of attraction for her. Here’s some things women tend to obsess over that guys could really give two sh*ts about:

1. saggy boobs

while its safe to say that men probably aren’t going to go gaga if your boobs look like you’ve duct taped two deflated water balloons to your chest, we realize that boobs (especially big boobs) tend to sag and we’re perfectly ok with that. in fact, its actually kind of hot to take off a woman’s bra and watch her boobs fall and sprint out of that bitch like usain bolt.

2. stretch marks

as long as they’re not on your forehead

3. how soon you’ve “given it up”

while it is true that a guy’s opinion of you might change if you don’t wait until a “suitable” (and, remember, “suitable” is completely arbitrary) time has passed before deciding to sleep with him, this only makes a difference if he wasn’t really that into in the first place and is basically just looking for a reason to eliminate you.

if he really likes you, it wont matter if you slept with him after four great dates or four great days, he’s still going to think just as highly of you afterward

4. how much you eat

it amazes me to hear about a grown-ass woman a ordering ceaser salad and ice water and shit on her date, only to have to cut it short because her stomach is growling like busta rhymes in the scenario video. granted, when the menu comes, its probably not a good look to tell the waiter “yeah, just gimme page 2“, but if we wanted to date someone who ate like a six year old boy we would have been catholic priests

5. gifts

although we love gifts as much as anyone else, our love for them is more “cool. new shit.” than “wow! she really must have taken alot of time to think about this“. the thought doesn’t count any more than a gift card does

6. whether your expert-level bedroom prowess will scare us away

***channeling katt williams***

never the history of n*ggadom has a n*gga slept with his chick and thought to himself “damn!!! she’s a f*cking freak!!! i had no idea a wet elbow could do so many things. she’s so freaky in fact that she must have actually had sex with someone else before she met me. since that’s probably true, i can’t continue to date her”

7. your hair anywhere other than the top of your head & legs

again, while having legs that feel like brown sugar cactuses when they’re laying next to you isn’t whats hot in the streets, obsessing to the point of neurosis over your eyebrows, eyelashes, armpits, and pubic area just makes us think you’re even crazier than we already think you are

8. whether we’ll be upset that your jeans are target brand instead of true religion

there’s actually a word for guys who really care about stuff like that, and it starts with ‘h” and rhymes with “logoplaxical”

9. your age

i’m not going to say that age doesn’t matter, but most guys are more concerned with how old a woman looks and acts than how old she actually is. we’d much rather be with an active and youthful 37 year old than a 25 year old who looks like she lived through and slept with the great depression.

guys, did i miss anything? also, ladies, is there anything that men obsess over that you all could really give two shits about? the carpet is yours

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Drunk Florida Marlins Fans Acting Like Heathens Brawl In The Stands

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8 Year Old Third Grader Caught With 60 Bags Of Heroin After Teachers See Him Passing Them Out Like Candy


Yvonne Davis’ outrage upon hearing that a third-grader handed out bags of heroin at her grandchildren’s Wilkinsburg school was tempered only by the fact that none of the children sampled the drug.

Oh my Lord Jesus, there but by the grace of God these kids are all right,” said Davis of Wilkinsburg, PA, whose two granddaughters attend Turner Elementary School. “It’s very scary to hear that this happened in a school full of small children.

Wilkinsburg police said teachers became suspicious Tuesday afternoon when they saw an 8-year-old boy repeatedly “rummaging” through his pockets. They confronted him and found 60 single-dose bags, known as stamp bags, in his pockets, police Chief Ophelia “Cookie” Coleman said.

A full stamp bag sells for about $10 on the street, she said.

The bags each contained residue that police, using a field test kit, determined was heroin, Coleman said. Teachers found 18 empty stamp bags in a trash can. The bags, stamped with the words “Trust Me,” were sent to the Allegheny County Crime Lab for analysis and confirmation of the heroin finding, Coleman said.

This is not a reflection on Turner Elementary School; this speaks to the environment this child was living in,” Coleman said.

Coleman said school officials and police met with the boy and his mother and learned he is not supposed to be attending the school because he lives in Pittsburgh. Authorities did not identify the family.

Investigators have a “pretty good idea” where the drugs came from but made no arrests as of Wednesday evening, Coleman said. Wilkinsburg police contacted the District Attorney’s Office to discuss possible charges, but Coleman declined to elaborate.

She said the boy indicated “he was emulating what he had seen on the streets — selling drugs.”

The boy gave the stamp bags to other children. Superintendent Archie D. Perrin Jr. said school officials talked to each of the children who came in contact with the heroin and warned their parents to be alert for behavior changes. He said he received no reports of children becoming sick.

Janitors searched the school for signs of drugs but found none, Perrin said. The school plans to meet with parents soon to discuss the incident, and officials sent a letter home with students explaining some of what happened.

As a precaution, the district is advising all parents to talk to their children about any interaction they might have had with the student and, possibly, the substance, and take appropriate action,” the letter said.

The county Department of Children, Youth and Families is involved, and Perrin said the student had not returned to school.

Jan Gooden, 53, has a foster child who attends fourth grade at Turner. She said she was saddened to hear about the heroin incident.

I think it’s the parents’ fault,” Gooden said. “A child that age can’t buy drugs. It had to come from home, and that is a shame.

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Lloyd Banks Live w/ FunkMaster Flex On Hot 97

more about “Lloyd Banks Live w/ FunkMaster Flex O…“, posted with vodpod

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OutKast Planning Comeback Album

Superstar rap duo OutKast is planning to record its first album in four years. Big Boi and Andre Benjamin aka Andre 3000 released their last record, in 2006 – which shot to number two in the Billboard 200 and went platinum in the U.S. The pair took time away from their joint project to focus on solo ventures, but Big Boi has revealed the duo is back in studio – and the material they are working on is “top secret”. He tells BBC Radio 1, “That’s all top secret information right now. We can’t let people know what we’re doing. You better know that something is brewing.”

Beside talking about the group’s next album, Big Boi also discussed his own record, saying Andre 3000 will appear on his solo album “Sir Luscious Left Foot: The Son of Chico Dusty”, which is due out later this year. “He’s on the record, he makes two appearances,” he gushed. “He also produced a track on it that’s crazy, bananas, one of the last songs I’m recording right now. There are a lot of surprises on it.”

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Groupie Tales: Jamie Foxx

Jamie Foxx Makes Friends With Security?
This was last summer. Jamie Foxx was staying at a hotel in mah city. Me and my gurls were huge Jamie Foxx fans, and this was around da time da movie Ray came out. So me and mah gurl headed down to the hotel to try and cop a peek at dat sexy nigga. We went into da lobby and there were these guys lounging on da couches. Not to b conceited but my gurls and I was looking sexy and fly, especially I, I had on my Gucci, my Louis, and had just got mah weave sewn in. So dem niggas was eyein us and one of them finally came ova and said to me “what u sexy gurls doin hur? Ya know we hur with Jamie Foxx, he be down in a min ma, come on ova and wait with us, he’ll appreciate sexy gurls like urself.” Well as ya can imagine I almost died of eccitement! Me and my gurls went over and sat at the couches wit dem. Like 10 mins later Jamie came down. When I saw that sexy caramel brutha walk out the elavator I almost creamed my panties right then and there, damn son he was lookin so good, with a silk button down shirt, sean jean jeans, and sunglasses and lots of bling bling. Nigga muss had on at least $100K and I knew I had to get me some of that there money.
Jamie came and sat with us and he was such a gentleman, kissin my gurls on the cheeks as he introduced himself. When he got to me, I said “you aint gotta tell me who u r, im yo biggest fan” and gave him a kiss and a hug, and I let ma hands go a little low to feel that booty if ya know what I mean, and damn it was tight. Jamie laughed and we conversed in small talk for a min, just getting to know each other. While we were talking I kept seein Jamie eyein my cleavage. I leaned over and whispered in his ear “ya like these milk duds don’t u?” and shook dem a bit to tease him and give him a sneak peak. He licked his lips and said “damn gurl, u getting me real hard, lets get outta here and imma let u really get down to work” he nodded to his boys and took my hand and lead me to the elevator. I waved to my gurls and I swear u could tell them bitches was so jealous and wanted to kill my ass right then and there lol but I didn’t care. They was busted up compared to how sexy I was lookin, so no doubt Jamie choose me over dem heffers. I was so nervous and horny and the elevtor took foreva to get to da 17th floor. We finally get to jamie’s room and that nigga wasted no time to getting down to his drawers.

He told me to take mah clothes off, and I stripped down to my viktorias secret pink panties and bra. Jamie said “damn gurl u looking so fine like a bottle of wine!” and grabbed my waist and started to kiss me. Damn when his tongue entered my mouth it made me instantly moist and so horny. He took off his drawers and told me to kneel down. I did and I took his manhood into my mouth and started workin it with my tongue, makin sure to work the head. Jamie started moanin and groanin, holdin my head tryin to get me to deep throat that shit, and I did cuz I was so hungry for that black meat. His dick be nice and dark, a bit darker den the rest of his body, nice and long, about 8 inches and thick, makin me open mah mouth wide open to get all dat shit in lol. He started sweatin, makin his muscles glisten which made dis bitch hot and bothered!

Jamie lifted me up and took me to the bed. He took my bra off with a quickness, aint no brother ever unhooked my bra that quick, and slipped off mah panties. He asked me if I ever had a man orally pleasure me, and I said no, but I was a damn lie lol. He started lickin on mah clit and workin his tongue in my coochie. Makin me moan like a porn star ho. He got me nice and wet and he had my pussy juices all ova his mouth and face. He took me to a place I damn never been to before, makin me sing “You ticklin in, you feelin in it, you swimming in it, you gonna get it MOIST” he stopped and laughed and asked “dat janet Jackson- Moist right?” and we both laughed. He then said he was ready to get to the real action and asked me to get into doggy style position. I did, and he started to put his big ol’ thang in my tight coochie hole and I said “wait, where da condoms at?” and he said “oh we don’t need them, I had a vasectomy” and he went to work. Let me tell u, he knows how to grind and wind that dick, reaching all da walls and makin the rain come down! Dat nigga was ridin me so hard he pulled a damn track out mah weave! He just tossed it aside and kept goin and I was thinking to mahself “damn nigga that shit aint cheap!” and prayed he didn’t pull more out. After like 15mins of doggy, he lay down on da bed and demanded me to get on top. He was able to keep workin da dick even wit me on top, and in a few min he had me cumin like niagra falls! My pussy juices ran down his big wang and he told me to jerk him off. I did and he started to yell he was close. And I mean yell like he was bein murdered lol, nigga like to get loud when he close. He begged me to swallow, and so i put my mouth over his delicious man rod and he spilled his seed in my mouth, and it tasted good! I aint never like dat shit but jamies seed tastin like a luxurious dessert!

I thought we was done, but Jamie told me to lay on da bed. He took my legs and put dem behind my head, spreadin mah ass cheeks. He saw my cute hole and said “GURRRL, DAT A BOOTY HOLE!” and started to lick on it and rub it with his fingers. I aint NEVA had no nigga all up on der, and was kinda scared, I didn’t prepare for no anal if ya know what I mean. But he stuck some fingers up der and started workin dem ass walls. As he was workin mah booty hole with his fingers he started singing ray charles’s Georgia, workin his fingers in there. I was thinking “damn what the fuck dis nigga thinking bout Georgia” but his voice was like an angel so I wasn’t complainin lol. he then started to shove his big dick in der and I yelled for him to stop. He was too damn big and I aint have nothing up in der, never mind his huge manhood. so he asked if I was ready for another round and I said sho nuff, and he fucked mah pussy again, and made me scream profanities.

After we was done, we showered together and got dressed. He told me he was gonna b in town for a while, and gave me his numba. I took it but had no intentions of callin him back. This was a one time groupie thing, I was just after braggin rights.

He offered me some money and I asked how much dat nigga had. He showed me at least $5 G’s and I just went out there and asked for $1,000, and joked that he owed me for that weave track he pulled out. He laughed and handed me the money.

So we go back downstairs and I meet up with mah gurls and he and his crew got ready to go upstairs to da room. I kiss him goodbye and mah gurls are lookin green with rage lol and as soon as we step outside dat hotel they ask for all dem details.

Would I ever do it again? Hell yes, but only one night stands. Jamie knows how to put it down but I think he gets a thrill from usin gurls to bust a nut and leavin dey ass as he goes to another town, no relationships for him. Jamie was my 1st celeb enounter and it was a good one, considerin I was only 18 at the time lol. Jamie left me wit some experience I can use to put on other bruthas, so I aint complainin.

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Big Ass Parade 2010 In Amsterdam [Pt. 2]

more about “Big Ass Parade 2010 In Amsterdam [Pt. 2]“, posted with vodpod

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BIRTHRATE FALLS

http://i116.photobucket.com/albums/o8/wabi_sabi/miles_birth1061.jpg

Women of all major racial groups
experienced a decline in birthrate
in 2008 (the latest year for which
complete figures are available).
The decline pushed the birthrate
below 2.1 children per woman. That
means American women, as a whole,
did not have enough children to
match the death rate. Thus, the
nation’s population could start to
decline. Among major population
groups, Hispanic women in 2008 had
the highest birthrate – 98.6 births
per 1,000 women. This compares with
birthrates of 71.2 per 1,000 women
for African American women, 71.4
for Asian American women and 59.6
for white women.

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PATTI LABELLE TO GET HONORARY DEGREE

http://z.about.com/d/movies/1/0/P/g/8/tiffany03290620.jpg

R&B diva Patti LaBelle, a four-
decade veteran of the music
industry, will pick up an honorary
degree next month from Temple
University in her hometown of
Philadelphia. Miss Patti will add a
doctorate in humane letters to her
list of career achievements, which
include multiple hit records, four
books (including two cookbooks) and
philanthropic work in diabetes.

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RESTRAINING ORDER FILED AGAINST ACTOR

http://www.exposay.com/celebrity-photos/columbus-short-stomp-the-yard-world-premiere-mRRuBp.jpg

A man who claims his jaw was broken
by actor Columbus Short has filed a
restraining order against the star
that will keep him 100 yards at
bay. Jason Hill took out the R.O.
on Monday after telling the court
Short beat him so badly in the
February 24 attack, he needed two
surgeries to fix his broken jaw.

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Footage Of Invincible Homeless Man In The Streets Getting Hit By A Car & Then Jumpin Right Up

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Dvd Teaser: Nicki Manaj – “Behind The Butt”

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Shyne Releases Another Freestyle “Un-Thinkable” & Disses 50 Cent!

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Jim Jones Getting At Rappers Portraying To Be Ballers/Gangsters, French Montana In The Hood Talking To The Law & Speaks On Red Cafe Jumpin In His Twitter Beef With Fabolous!

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